Sudden desire (when the thirst of sexual proximity arises), this spontaneous need for intimate relations and sexual pleasure is perceived by the majority as a perfectly natural feeling. If your health's okay, your need for sex comes from time to time sharply, whispering like bubbles in a booze with champagne, but also how people feel that " otherwise " are hungry or when they want to drink. The need for sex is considered a human instinct, an internal incentive. Freudists call it "libido," and if that's the most lybido they're missing, then a non-specialist is likely to call it "hungry” (or a scientist called "frigidity," - did you not, by the way, notice that "frigid" fathers are only women, and that's what men do not apply?
But sometimes the absence of sexual hunger poses a serious problem: some women (and some men too) experience a real disguise of sex and, at the same time, everything that has to do with the lower body. In our sexual practice, there are couples in which one party sufficiently understands the other side and " respects " her desires and needs, but whose intimate relationship is so inappropriate that eventually becomes a permanent source of fighting and family disorders.
Those who are concerned about their lack of sexual hunger are often perceived as a purely physical deficiency. They are more likely to suffer from a lack of energy, so they are starting to feel that they are experiencing some serious illness; they even often ask the Spider who sees them: is it not guilty of this hormonal imbalance that determines the general condition of the organism? Many questions are also asked about the impact on the sex of contraceptive pills (especially the issue has often arisen in the early years of the mass use of hormonal contraceptives, because the progesterone was held in such large doses as to reduce sexual desire); and also therapists are often asked about the relationship between hormones and libido in the climax period. Some women realize that their menstrual cycle has an impact on their sexual impulse, and many are not heart-to-hearted.
When a woman, during menstruation or vulture, has a " stinking appetite " for sex, she only faces an instinctive, animal start in herself. The same is true of women who are particularly eager to have sex during pregnancy.
On the other hand, if there's no spontaneous sexual desire at all, it's also unpleasant. People have feelings for themselves. They are visited by thoughts: " I am not as much as others! " , which may lead to a break with me and a deep depression. People are often ashamed of their misperceptions, often shy to seek specialist assistance.
Numerous drugs that affect psychology have a negative impact on spontaneous sexual desire. Anyone who is experiencing, for example, severe illness or death of loved ones may temporarily lose the need for sex, and no one will find it strange. And if the physical condition of the organism is weakened, if a person has no power at all, he has no interest in the continuation of the species, he also does not have, in the first place, savings in power and energy. For example, dialysis patients, asthma patients with scattered sclerosis, heroin addicts and chronic alcoholics are all at risk, and their sexual desire is likely to be at one of the most recent locations on the priority list.
But it would be a mistake to link frigidity only to a man's physical condition. Similarly, the idea that men (through their nature and the greater impact of hormones on their organisms) are always more interested in sex than women is, of course, not something other than a strong exaggeration and typical simplification of the real picture without psychological factors.
In the history of disease, women who turn to sex workers can find a lot in common. Sexual education, which parents continue to do so, continues to be based on a variety of insurance and complexes and a diminishing role in sex. Many parents also give an inspiring example to their children, with neither love nor locus. In addition, research has shown that the incredibly high percentage of women in childhood or adolescence have experienced sexual behaviour by others who have violated their privacy. In some families, boys and girls receive significant different signals: girls are often less likely than boys to be educated about sex. Compilation of insufficient knowledge of sex with low self-assessment and disrespect may result in a woman ' s inability to object to her partner ' s intransigence.
The interaction between parents may also create a dynamic of relationships where the wishes of one partner are reflected in a form that complicates his or her life. The struggle for power among partners is what their relationship is often engendered, and it is often very comical for the outside observer. It should be noted that this applies not only to heterosexual couples, since differences regarding the frequency of sexual relations exist, of course, with same-sex couples.
Most of the relations between human beings are marked by constant conflicts of interest between their participants. Let it be a simple situation: on Sunday, for example, one of the partners will want to go out on the forest, while the other will insist on their desire to watch the tennis championship on TV...
If such problems are accumulated, it may be said that the spouses (or a permanent couple) have problems in relations, and these relationships are no longer " normal " in the common sense of the word. When it comes to differences in sexual preferences, the pressure that one partner starts to exert on another is complicating, both with regard to the frequency and quality of communications.
If one of the partners wishes another not often enough, it may cause specific difficulties. It is a matter of great concern that the obsession is: " What if I don't love him/her anymore? " If one of the partners feels a regular need to lie with and touch another in bed (this is called " Spooning " , because it is the position of partners as two spoons, one in the other, a spoon in English " front " ) but the other does not seem to be so exciting, he wants " real sex " .
When such a couple comes to a sexist, it usually sounds like, "I think we have too little sex, and it's all his/her fault." However, they do not take into account the fact that partners may have different sex preferences, both of which must take into account.
Differences in the sexual needs of men and women may occur in different ways. At times, the conflict is exacerbated to the extent that there is a violent struggle between partners for each of the territories. They are stubborn on their own, not wanting to take into account the fact that one of the couples needs sexual satisfaction, and the other only attention can be arranged. With the sexual revolution that took place in the twentieth century, people have become more tolerant of each other ' s sexual behaviour, and now few of the couples consider themselves unacceptable when one partner, in order not to disturb another ' s claim, is satisfied. It helps to avoid many conflicts. At the very least, this eliminates the humiliating scene in which an unsatisfactory spouse requires the wife to discharge her marital debt. The basic rule today is that sex occurs only on one condition: it involves both partners, ranging from pre-feasibility (erotic stimulus) to sex and orgasm for both. Otherwise, one partner feels used, the other feels guilty and, as a result, no one is satisfied or hurt. The reader must have known who was the prosecutor and who was the accused.
Of course, men insist on sex more often. Traditionally, men are believed to be more concerned about sex than women, and a man who has been rejected can comfort himself by the idea that " women are all " and that his neighbour has the same problems as him. Men often exchange anecdotes on this subject with their friends and colleagues, but they are ashamed to see what happened as a serious problem. Well, if a man has a best friend he can talk to in the shower and tell the truth about what happened. A woman in this situation won't worry too much about what happened because she knows that all men have one in mind and that women often put pressure on men to have sex... She, unlike a man, will have to share her problems: women have to discuss things with close friends. They'll help her, support her, stand on her side, say that besides sex, there's a lot of other things in life, and that her partner should understand that. But what do you do to a woman that her partner denied her satisfaction? It will be much more difficult for her to deal with this situation because it is " unnormal " , confusing the very foundations of our usual sex roles.
She'll instinctively feel that she's better off talking to no one else, otherwise she's going to get away with...
The situation required clarification, but the possible answers were rather vicious. 'Cause all this could mean that she's responsible for everything... Her partner's gonna be ashamed to share a problem with his friends, too, afraid he'll be considered impotent, because then you can understand why he doesn't want to have a case with her... What if he suddenly fell in love with someone else? Or is it possible that he actually prefers boys or men more? What if she's too straight to him?
The only book on this is written by American Janet Wolf, a psychologist in family relations, and it's called "What to do when his head hurts."♪
The book is not fun. Wolf emphasizes that a situation in which a woman desires sex more than a partner is considered unusual and requires special Delhi. Men who have read this book can't be separated from the sense of shame.
They do not, however, understand the fact that women are constantly forced to undergo their fragile masculine dignity by taking as much as possible a less aggressive position in relations. In fact, women do not need to pretend that they actually meet such a fundamentally unequal position. This book is in part a continuation of the American tradition, the leading representative of which is John Grey (author of the book). Men from Mars and women from Venus) Such literature highly values the ideal of romantic love, in which all unpleasant people ' s relationships are viewed in terms of both men and women ' s best motivations, and then they just start to interfere with each other because of their own ignorance or naiveness. The very fact that there is a considerable amount of anger in any relationship, as well as a desire for power, is simply ignored in such books, as they do not highlight the fact that, from the position of women ' s emancipation, the division of duties (actical and emotional) in many heterosexual couples should be raised. The same topic was discussed by the Austrian sociologists, Cheryl Benard, and Edith Schlaffer, in the book " Leave the men alone " , which is to a greater extent.
At the end of the topic, some figures were: about 10 years ago, one research project in the United States found that every third woman claimed that she had too little need for sex, whereas only one of the six men agreed. Twenty years ago, sexologists were usually approached by couples, where women complained of having less sex than her partner, but today the situation has changed dramatically. Nowadays, men are increasingly approaching sexologists, with complaints of sexual abuse. But today, couples have access to the most varied information, and they are able to help themselves solve problems in relationships.
The sexual reaction phase, which was studied by Masters and Johnson, is characterized by the parallel existence of the phenomenon of mental (behaviour, sexual unrest) and physical (birth spraying in women, which gives rise to sexual lips and clitre, as well as lubrication in the vagina).
At this stage, the most common sex problem for men is inability to erection. Erection is a complex response to sexual initiation, and a range of diseases, post-operative complications and medicines can prevent a man from achieving erection even under optimum mental incentive. Acquisition plays an important role in the process of intimate relations. Men who feel mental instigation but do not receive an appropriate response from their body start to be nervous and lose the concentration necessary for the sexual act.
Women ' s illness and acceptance of certain medicines may also lead to a breakdown of the link between reason and body. After a climacteric period in which the body is less influenced by hormones of estrogen, the slimeous releases in the vagina are so altered that the vagina will be much slower to provide the necessary lubrication, even if there is strong excitement. In the first years of the use of contraceptive pills, when the dose of the progesterone was very high, their women sometimes complained about the elevated dryness of the vagina. This was, however, usually the result of insufficiently strong solicitation.
A few women approach sexologists with complaints of lack of initiation, and they often come to complaints of pain during sexual acts.
There are also frequent cases of women ' s treatment of health-care clinics. And that's because it's hard for them to talk about sex. You can call a doctor a lot of symptoms that can and may not be directly related to sex: it's both the availability of ejections and the pain in the lower abdomen and the breakdown of the menstrual cycle.
Therapists who have received appropriate education will now have to ask questions to identify real sexual problems. And often in response, they hear that women have difficulties in starting. For example, the Netherlands Society of Terrapists considers that sexual disorders pose a high risk to human health in general and requires its members to pay greater attention to the " hidden " problems of patients seeking assistance.
Medical assistance is needed because the problems that may arise at the instigation stage are difficult to detect and assess those men and women who are exposed to them. In general, people have a greater sensitivity to physical abuse than anything that accompanys them in the emotional sphere. If both a man and a woman are allowed to be guided by their feelings in a sexual act, then sooner or later, someone will say to myself: " I don't get the pleasure I usually get today. Something's wrong with me... It's hard for a man who's not inclined to admit to this partner, who has no such problem. It can be compared to what you're feeling if your friend didn't find anything special in the book or in the movie that gave you incredible admiration. It is true that if we discuss exactly what your differences in assessments are, it will have a positive impact on your relationship with your partner.
It is possible to help solve the problem by openly talking to each other, whipping out his emotions. But somehow, it's the hardest thing to do to people with sexual difficulties. After a man and a woman began to touch each other, at a time when a man does not have an erection (for the time he normally has a period of pre-screen), the situation becomes unpleasant.
In the near future, he might not be too close to being intimate, but felt that it was necessary to start a prelude simply because he had not had sex for a long time or because the partner wanted it so badly; and often so, the man thought that his man ' s dignity would be negatively affected by the fact that he had missed the opportunity to have sexual contact. For such men, the phrase " I want sex " is the same as the words " I want sex " , and as soon as such a logical mistake arises, it is clear that failure to erection is perceived as a physical problem.
If a woman takes part in love loops, without paying attention to her reluctance, she'll wonder why she doesn't have a lubricant in the vagina and why the sexual act brings discomfort, and naturally decides that she has problems. Women who suffer from pain can find later that their sluggish casing is damaged, and their moral condition leaves much to be desired.
The pain in sexual intercourse is different. If women from an accidentally chosen group ask whether they have ever experienced sexual harassment, there is no doubt that more than 50 per cent will respond positively. Most of the pain will be the result of sexual intercourse for the first time, with sexual intercourse with candidose and without sexual initiation.
Sometimes, however, a woman calls a doctor for help in the event of a " real " awakening problem: she has a great passion for love and is very excited, but the expected physical satisfaction does not come (not completely or even partially).
The reason can be removed from our knowledge of physiology, as well as from our current, much better understanding of men ' s erection problems. In the case of a low level of estrogen (i.e. after climax, after an operation to remove ovarians or after the dialysis of kidneys), the vagina can respond to a particular incentive much slower than normal. Sometimes blood vessels (which should be expanded to give rise to physical, sexual initiation) become sclerotic. This is usually inextricably linked to high blood pressure and nicotine attachment. The abnormal functioning of blood vessels may be the result of diabetes; moreover, women with diabetes are more likely to be exposed to vaginal infections (this may in turn lead to a disease in the vagina).
The neural signal triggering the vascular reaction may be interrupted in diseases such as dispersed sclerosis and spinal damage. Some serious small pelvis operations cannot be carried out without damaging the nerves leading to the vagina; the most commonly encountered in such operations is the removal of a straight bowel in the case of cancer (a surgery usually requiring the establishment of a washing, i.e. the artificial extraction of a straight bowel from the front surface of the abdomen). Finally, some medications provide physical sexual initiation in relation to their impact on the nervous system. In this area, we also know much more about men than women, but it can be assumed that substances that negatively affect men ' s erection can also reduce the vagina ' s reaction to sexual incentives in women.
Orgasm requires a well-focused stimulus in the right places, so those who want to experience orgasms must first examine how the sex machinery works. There are delicate differences between girls ' and boys ' education, so it is easy to explain the differences in the orgasm skills of men and women.
In general, almost all boys are able to learn about herbism, with almost all of them reaching orgasm for the first time without any other assistance.
The majority of women also experience their first orgasms thanks to masturbation, but there are many women who have experienced orgasms for the first time as a result of the partner ' s actions, and many (and this is a fairly large percentage) will never subsequently resort to masturbation. The time when orgasm occurs for the first time varies among boys and girls: many boys experience their first orgasm between 10 and 16 years, while girls can do so both earlier and later.
It is quite unusual for a young man not to experience orgasm before the age of 20, and if he is to seek counsel for a psychologist, he will see a lack of orgasm as a sign of strong deterrence, depression, neurotic anxiety and mental conflict. If a 20-year-old girl has never experienced an orgasm, it won't give a doctor any doubt about her mental health. It is in this context that the United States Psychologist, Lonnie Barbah, considered it appropriate to replace the term " orgasmia " (i.e. lack of an orgasm in sexual life) with a more optimistic " pre-argasmia " . However, even in the coming new millennium, the term is still somewhat surprising, as it is so much like another new version of “politically correct” designations.
Women seeking assistance in connection with their inability to achieve an orgasm are usually divided into two groups: some have never experienced orgasm, others have somehow stopped testing it. In the second group (secondary anorgasmy group), problems usually occur in relationships with a partner. The couples are also still complaining to therapists that a woman can't achieve an orgasm with one vagina stimulus (see Freud theory), although most people already know that the orgasm depends mainly on the incentive of the clitoris. Sexologists have an empirical rule which is that if secondary anorgasmia affects both partners, primary anorgasmia requires an individual approach. Lonnie Barbah has developed a special type of group therapy for pre-orgasmic women. This therapy is based on the idea that pre-orgasmic women are best able to understand their own orgasm reactions if they start to develop their feelings through masturbation. In the 1970s, provocation was seen in the proposal: then most women clinged to the idea that sexual satisfaction was only possible with a man, and Lonnie encouraged them to do so alone.
In the 1990s, however, the proportion of abnorgasm patients in the practice of sex workers declined significantly. Some sex centres have adopted a group approach to the treatment of sexual problems in women, although their problems have not been the same. I mean, the number of women suffering from anorgasmia in itself has declined, but their psychological problems have become more complex. And sexologists have become confronted with problems when they reach an orgasm that they have been very difficult to solve. Most of these women ' s problems were related to fear, desecration and trauma.
Men have a major problem in terms of orgasm, with premature ejaculation, and it is striking that women have no such problem at all. Whatever changes the sex revolution, and women still don't have to control their own sexual reactions, while men have to do so. It is for men to take responsibility for sexual acts and orgasm, while women are mainly expected to be primarily impulsive.
This strange name describes the phase of the Masters and Johnson curve, at which time the bodies involved in sexual interacting are again in a state of calm. This phenomenon is, to say, on the surface, but scientists have so far shown little attention to the emotional aspects of this phase. Aristotle also noted: "Post coitum omne animal triste " (or: " After the salinity of any sadness " ). That all animals (except women and petukhs) have a state of grief after the absorption, people knew in the pole when scholars were shattered about human sexuality. In those times, people, including scholars, had such strange ideas in their head that we should only be struck and misleading. Thus, Albert Great (1206-1280), a former dean of the University of Paris (which means, by definition, a priest) has expressed a number of ideas in his interpretation of “De coitu”, surprisingly tolerant for his time, but could not answer one of the most important questions for his era: why no one of the living creatures is human at all during the soundings? The very question that might surprise us is that he could only be asked by those scholars who gave a vow of marriage and followed the biblical precepts. Well, it's possible that Albert Great actually believed that a woman was made of Adam's rib...
People usually have no serious problems at the resolution stage. From time to time, bets living in sexual dissonance report to specialists that men and women have different sexual habits. If some of them come out of bed in a few moments to take a shower, and others want to enjoy their fortunes in a hurry, the feeling that they lack the air, that the body is lipstick from the sweat, and that the members have a blissful thread, then there may be differences between them. Such a clear distinction in sexual habits may lead to a discontent of a more sexually active partner. Something like, "Why did you just enjoy it as much as I did, so why don't you want to extend that pleasant feeling?" For some, the state of sexual ecstasy is an exceptional, unusual event, so after it comes to return to its usual “I”: normal, cost-effective, balanced. If one of the partners returns to mind several times and wishes to share the pleasure of this with his partner, who has already been " disconnected " , then this couple is certainly not on the same wave.
Women sometimes turn to a doctor for persistent abdominal pains that continue after sexual intercourse. These complaints are difficult to explain. In some cases, there appears to be a link between these pains and the continuing high level of instigation (i.e., the blood flow to the small pelagic pelvis) in the absence of an orgasm. Sustained blood tidal may lead to a lack of oxygen for some women, and an orgasm accompanied by an appropriate muscle activity guarantees a rapid return to normal blood circulation in the vascular system. Some women are able to complete a period of intense sexual activity that does not feel the need for orgasm, but physical problems may arise. The only way to find out is to try orgasm. Women sometimes find it difficult to focus on orgasms, to make themselves survive when they're completely different in their minds, for example, when something bothers them. Some people have headaches after sexual intercourse, and this is difficult to treat.
There are two distinct issues related to penetration. Vaginism refers to a state where a woman who suffers from the most serious sexual abuse is blocking (or almost blocking, through a non-voluntary spasma) the possibility of penetration of a male member in her body, and disparinity (worked or sexually sexually abused) is such a penetration when it can be performed, but it causes pain.
The classic picture of vaginaism is such: a young woman who is quite ignorant about sex and prefers not to cover these topics at all, notes that it is impossible to introduce a partner ' s penis in her vagina in the first attempt of sexual intimacy. If both continue these attempts, she will have a sense of pain, but even if a woman tries to overthrow the pain of her partner ' s attempts to enter it, her vagina is so " locked " , " doubtful " , that the partner will never be able to enter. Sometimes the muscle resistance is so strong even before the sexual organs come into contact that it doesn't even reach that contact. A woman who has suffered misconceptions is that she may wish very much to have sex, but it will barely reach the key moment, her legs are suddenly splintering, she's smashing her back, and she's starting to mess with so much rage that it's impossible to get involved.
If the couple who has this problem turns to his therapist, he (or she) can offer a woman ' s examination, in which case the doctor's couch is full and there's the same thing in bed. A doctor who must be aware of this disease will explain to both spouses (or permanent partners): it is not the fact that a woman has too narrow vaginas, but that she has a reflex muscle spasm that reduces the vagina ' s final muscles. Sometimes after such an explanation, if the doctor displays the necessary patience and the woman sufficiently trusts him, it is possible to conduct an internal examination with one finger. So he demonstrates to a woman that penetration is possible and that if she learns to relax her muscles and overcomes her fears, she can enjoy the sexual act.
As early as 1948, the American Gynecologist, Arnold Keguel, developed a practice system to strengthen the pelvis muscle. At that time, Keguel worked mainly with women who suffered from various types of complications following difficult births. However, there is often a lack of urine, as well as a loss of uterine, which, of course, leads to serious malpractice. The muscles of the pelvis, which form a solid base of the abdomen, may have lost the necessary tone, are usually easily determined by internal survey. Keguel taught his patients how to retrieve their pelvis muscles, and many women as a result were able to feel them, the muscles they had previously no idea. It wasn't easy to find this new feeling, so a simple pressure meter was designed to objectively judge the power of muscle compression. Shortly around Keguel, a bunch of bereaved patients emerged, despite the fact that the most important demand was regular exercises to achieve good results. Thereafter, of course, a variety of electrical stimulus devices have emerged in the market, which have allowed similar results to be achieved without the special efforts of the patient. Another device was a set of " sub-contracts "
To leave a comment , you need to Log in или пройти Registration